I thought it would be fun to put together a list of the top ten things you will never have in your kitchen. So, I will go first…
1. Miracle Whip (This girl only eats mayo!)
2. Pre-chopped Produce
3. Egg Beaters
4. Hamburger Helper
5. Durian (the stinky fruit!)
6. Canned Frosting
7. Juice “Drinks” – ie. Hi-C, Kool-Ade
8. Fake Sweeteners (Equal, Splenda)
9. Gravy in a pouch, jar or can
10. Reduced-Fat Peanut Butter
One word: SPAM
1. Frozen vegetables
2. Suddenly Salads
3. Low-Sugar Jelly
4. “Light” loaves of bread
5. Mild Salsa – it’s gotta have spice!
6. Microwaveable oatmeal – it takes 5 minutes to make the real thing!
Love the blog π
1. pre-minced garlic — Why? It takes 2 seconds to chop garlic
2. Mushrooms in a can or jar.
3. Lipton teabags
Amen on the Hamburger Helper, Juice drinks, and durian. I don’t get why my husband likes Miracle Whip. I blame his mother for that one.
1. spagheti-o’s
2. goober-http://www.smuckers.com/fg/pds/default.asp?groupid=2&catid=4&prodid=106
3. prunes
4. funyuns
5. frito-lay canned dips- with those pull tab tops!
1. Margarine
2. Cooking spray
3. Artificial sweeteners
4. Eggbeaters
5. Colas
6. Imported produce
7. Processed cheese-like subtances
8. Anything that contains nitrates or nitrites
9. Anything that contains high fructose corn syrup
10. Anything marketed as “low-fat”
Thanks for letting me play! This was fun.
1. splenda (more processed does not equal healthier!)
2. Cake mix, pancake mix etc. (baking is at least 80% of the fun)
3. Skim or flavoured yoghurt
4. Wonderbread *shudders*
5. Oreos (why do so many people love these stale, to-sweet cookies?)
6. Cruelly raised eggs or dairy
7. Meat
8. Pre-chopped fruit, swathed in cellophane
9. Kool-aide
10. Cheez whiz
That was so much fun!
1. Beef Liver
2. Pigβs or Chicken Feet
3. Processed Cheese
4. Coffee from a can
5. Instant Coffee
6. Any processed food that has an unreal color to it.
7. Artificially sweetened food or drink.
8. Sugared cereal
9. Vegetable shortening
10. Ice Cream that isnβt all natural.
1. anything that must be labeled “food” (eg: Velveeta)
2. peas in a can. (my dad used to threaten to cook those for us.)
3. anything called Hungry Man (excepting my husband, but I call him something else. π
4. “cooking wine”.
5. jam where the first ingredient isn’t a fruit.
6. chips ahoy. or those store bought cookies that are just shortening/flour circles with fake pink and yellow frosting with sprinkles.
7. peanut butter that’s pre-mixed with jelly in stripes. it just seems weird.
8. anything promoted by Emeril. or Rachel Ray.
9. anything called “butter flavored (artificially flavored)”
10. canned pasta.
1. Miracle whip (just gross, and why do they call it dressing?)
2. Mac & cheese in a box
3. cheese in a can (wrong on so many levels)
4. Frosting in a can
5. cake mix in a box
6. Sweet & low or equal
7. canned ham
8. Cilantro (the smell makes me physically Ill)
9. Imitation Vanilla
10. V8 Anything…. yuck!
1. Marg.
2. Peanut butter (hate the stuff)
3. Any instant meal in a pack.
4. Low fat stuff. yuk
5. My husband. (But he is good @ cleaning the oven)
Can’t think of any more at the mo, but most likely will as soon as I get off here!
Thank you for letting me play too.
Okay, here’goes~
1. Pickle relish (YUCK)
2. Miracle Whip
3. Fish Microwave Dinners
4. Tofu
5. Spam
Thanks!
Jess
I eat all types of crap but there are a few things I won’t buy
1. Wonderbread. I actually had to make an emergency trip to the AM/PM for bread and it was all they had so I bought it. My nine year wouldn’t eat it because he had never seen white bread. That is saying a lot considering how much he loves junk food.
2. Liver
3. Low-fat anything. Just eat less
4. French salad dressing, the orange stuff. My mom eats it on everything. I call it trailer park dressing.
5. Iceberg lettuce
6. Store bought eggs. Have you ever seen an egg factory. And it is a factory.
Haha I was glancing through the list and praying that I have none of the items in my fridge,
Luckily~I don’t!!
Horray!
1. vienna sausages (they look like fingers)
2. bread with HCF
3. cheez whiz
4. fruit loops
5. packaged frozen pancakes
6. anything from Tyson
7. velveeta
8. minute rice
9. spaghetti o’s
10. hot pockets
1) Non-dairy creamer, the non-fat creamer I’ve been seeing lately is on the same page, if its not real, don’t buy it.
3) Margarine
4) Sugar substitutes
5) egg-beaters
6) any sort of cake, cookie, biscuit, or muffin mix, and in the same category, break and bake cookies.
7) canned vegetables
8) refrigerated, pre-diced garlic
9) white bread (in first grade during my first school lunch I started crying because I thought they didn’t “cook” their bread…)
10) sauce packets (*gag)
There are ways to take short cuts that don’t involve poisoning yourself. Geesh.
1. velveta, cheese wiz, american chz and the like
2. egg beaters, or any egg substitute
3. skim milk
4. Kool-aid
5. a bread machine
6. canned frosting
7. Cool-whip
8. fat free heavy cream (???…i am perplexed by the existence of this)
9. canned veggies (excluding tomatoes, chilies)
10. butter flavored seasoning
1. Processed vegetable oils like canola and, gasp, corn
2. Industrial soy, especially soy “meats”, etc
3. Dannon
4. Carob
5. Instant potatoes
If you are serious about REAL mayo you should try Duke’s (mail order it if you don’t live in the South.) The only mayo sold in America that doesn’t have sugar as an ingredient. You’ll never eat Hellmann’s again.
Not being from America I’ve never even seen half these products! I just read through these lists going “well I can see what’s wrong with “cheez whiz” etc but what the hell do these people all have against egg beaters and why are they including them with food items??” It was only when I got to Kristen’s post that I realised you weren’t actually talking about the kitchen implement! Egg substitute though – ewwww.
1. Supermarket ground meat (we grind our own)
2. Anything imported from China
3. Farm-raised fish from any Asian country
4. Instant coffee
5. Soda Pop, Bottled water, Energy drinks, etc.
6. Margarine
7. “Cooking” wine
8. White loaf bread (like Wonder bread)
9. Iceberg lettuce
10. Tofu
I’m frankly surprised at the lack of love for egg beaters. How else are you supposed to make microwave souffles?
Amy’s list:
1. Real mayo (ooo… she’s confrontational)
2. Brussels sprouts
3. Powdered Gravy Mix
4. Red Delicious Apples
5. Avocados
Joel’s list:
1. Cake/pancake/other dry mix
2. Cheese whiz
3. Canned green beans or peas
4. Rice in a pouch and or box
5. A shortage of chocolate
1. produce or meats from Wal-Mart
2. fish in a pouch/can
3. pink stuff/blue stuff/yellow stuff … if I wanted to poision myself I would find a more interesting way to do it
4. MSG (see #3)
5. anything with the words “artificial flavoring”
6. spray butter
7. fruit rolls ups. I mean, seriously.
8. canned boiled peanuts
9. those pink eggs in a giant gallon jar
10. anything called “pudding” that’s in the meat section
1. Cool whip
2. Krab
3. Pre-sliced bread
4. Creamy peanut butter (crunchy rocks!)
5. Anything that comes in a tub or a bucket
6. Tilapia
7. Boxed cereal
8. Yellow mustard
9. Cup o’ anything
10. Evidently cookies come un-baked and on a tray now, but not in my kitchen
1. Miracle Whip. Not EVER.
2. Canned soup (exception: chicken broth)
3. Velveeta or Aerosole Cheese
4. Butter Flavored Anything
5. Muffin Mixes with Fake Fruit (those little blueberry fake outs)
6. Canned potatoes, mushrooms, yams, green beans, peas, or asparagus
7. Pigs Feet
8. That white fish stuff from the Ethic Aisle
9. Margerine
10. Underwood Deviled Meats or Potted Meat Products
11. Non Dairy Creamers
12. Lemon or Lime Juice in a plastic squeeze bottle
13. Frozen Sandwiches, both microwaveable (Hot Pockets) or defrost ready (Peanut Butter Uncrustables)
14. Tuna Lunch Kits (come on… pack some crackers and make your own tuna salad)
15. Jars of chopped garlic
16. Lipton’s Tea Bags
17. Marshmallow Fluff
18. Cool Whip
I freely admit I’m guilty of a few — I use Splenda regularly because I can’t have “real” sugar in quantity and honestly, Splenda can be a lifesaver for those of us in this category. I’ve used many a cake-mix, also. I make up for it by being snob about other stuff.
1. Frozen breaded fish of any variety.
2. Bologna
3. Spam
4. Spray Cheese in a can
5. Vienna sausages
6. Pickled eggs
7. Pigs feet, tripe, cow tongue, or Chitterlings
8. Pork rinds
9. All canned vegetables (excluding pickled beets and tomatoes, which I guess technically are a fruit)
10. Canned Baked beans and Pork ‘n Beans
11. Miracle whip
12. Pre-made frozen pie dough
13. Refrigerated canned biscuits
14. Brown ‘n Serve rolls
15. Imitation vanilla (or any other) flavoring
16. Boxed wine
17. Cake mixes
18. Frozen pancakes
19. Bisquick (and other baking mixes)
20. Kraft Parmesan cheese
21. Canned black olives
22. Ocean spray jellied cranberry sauce
23. Canned fruit cocktail
24. Anything Chef Boyardee
25. Instant potato’s (mashed, au gratin, etc)
I’ve been living away from the U.S. for awhile and looking at these lists makes me never want to return! But when I do, a few things to be banned:
1. Cool Whip
2. Driscoll’s strawberries
3. anything advertising “100 calories.” Practice portion control, people.
4. hydrogenated oil
5. factory-farm eggs. Also Egg Beaters.
6. fat-free dairy products
7. yogurt with gelatin, stabilizers, etc.
8. bread-and-butter pickles. Sorry, I think they’re gross.
9. fruit canned in heavy syrup
10. bread that practically has more additives than it does flour
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1. Instant soups (I prepare my own soups);
2. Margerine (I use butter instead);
3. Fat reduced products;
4. Aspartame and other edulcorants;
5. Industrial white bread (usually I prefer the traditional bread);
6. Spam (tried it once, didn’t like it. Read the label, promised myself I would never use it again. Thank God it’s a rarity around here);
7. Sea sticks, sea delicassy or whatever they like to call it (a frozen white mass made with left-overs from the fish industry);
8. Industrial bacon;
9. Tofu and other soya derived food;
10. Canned fruits and vegetables.
Great blog, by the way! Congratulations!
1. Miracle Whip (to be honest, I never would have thought of this one if it weren’t for all the other mentions)
2. Canned green beans
3. Margarine
4. Artificial sweetener
5. Egg substitite
6. Fat-free cream/non-dairy creamer/anything else that is inherently oxymoronic
7. Non-bakery bread
8. Carob (or a shortage of high-end chocolate)
9. Pre-ground coffee
10. An empty fridge/freezer π
1/Margarine
2/Egg Beaters ( egg substitute)
3/Frozen vegetables
4/ canned meat of any kind
5/frozen frenchfries
6/any frozen meal/dinner
In no particular order:
1. “maple flavored” syrup
2. coffee crystals
3. spray cheese
4. fruity pebbles, fruit loops, and the like
5. margarine
6. anything made with partially hydrogenated oil or high fructose corn syrup
7. anything labeled “low fat,” “sugar free,” etc.
8. soda
9. alfredo sauce
10. anything “artificially flavored”
1. sugar cereal
2. doritos chips
3. canned mixed fruit (screams lunch ladies and hair nets)
4. pre-made cookie dough… misses the whole point!
5. play dough… is so easy and fun to make!
6. a box of frozen lasagna
7. and i think we all agree processed cheese gives us nightmares
1 – American cheese
2 – Processed “cheese food”
3 – bologna
4 – Cheetos
5 – Hamburger Helper
6 – canned frosting or box cake mixes
7 – Any ketchup but Heinz
8 – Any mayo that is not Hellmans
9 – Margarine
10 – Crisco
1. Iodized salt
2. Margarine
3. Pre-ground pepper
4. Cornbread mixes
5. Pickled foods that really shouldn’t be pickled (fish, eggs, asparagus, etc.)
6. Microwave popcorn packs
7. Low-fat mayo
8. Pre-ground coffee
9. Turkey bacon
10. Canned, pre-grated Parmesan cheese
1. Hot dogs
2. Canned Vegetables ( I grew up think I hated veggies because this was the only thing served.)
3. Durian
4. Spam
5. Pre-cut or chopped anything.
6. Cookie mixes or any pre-formed batter stuff for baking.
7. White Bread
8. Bleached flour
9. Oil in a spray can.
10. “Cheese” products that don’t require refrigeration.
How ’bout 20? Most of which are similar to those already here, with a few of my own oddities thrown in for good measure:
1. Margarine or Crisco
2. American Cheese, Velveeta, Cheez Whiz, etc.
3. Frozen meals (unless I made them and froze them myself), boxed meals, canned meals
4. Canned veggies (unless I canned them)
5. Cool Whip
6. Most boxed cereal, although I do have a soft spot for Grape Nuts, Cheerios, Crispix, and Raisin Bran
7. Wonderbread (or knockoffs), although I will occasionally buy sliced whole wheat bread
8. Most of the stuff from the middle aisles of the grocery store.
9. Coffee in a can
10. Farmed fish
11. Plastic tubes of ground meat
12. Egg substitutes, artificial sweeteners, non-dairy dairy things, etc.
13. Pre-chopped garlic or veggies. I mean, seriously?
14. Baking mixes
15. Canned meats
16. “____ flavored” items (like butter-flavored, vanilla-flavored, etc.)
17. Cooking wine and other such products that are low-quality versions of the original that are passed off on people with low confidence in their cooking abilities
18. Vegetarian “meat” products
19. Cumin
20. Curry powder
Most “food” in America is terrifying. These lists make me really sad.
How about a list of top 10 things you always have in your kitchen?
1. Meats of any kind.
2. Animal by-products of any kind. (I know… this automatically wipes out all sorts of items that I could put below such as Jello, most boxed cake mixes, marshmallow fluff…)
3. Instant Rice (or anything instant really…)
4. Mass-marketed snack foods
5. Anything with corn syrup
6. Iodized Salt
7. Bleached Flour
8. White bread
9. Pre-made hummus
10. Microwave popcorn
This is fun! Great idea!
1) Wheat
2) Rye
3) Barley
4) Anything that includes those ingredients and their derivatives π I’ve got Celiac Disease
5) Miracle Whip
6) 2% milkfat cheese
7) frozen dinners
8) celery (ew)
9) margarine
10) Any sort of canned meat (fish excluded)
1) Wheat
2)Miracle Whip
3)Margarine
4)Canned Meat
5)Canned Garlic(pre-chopped or pre-peeled)
6)Fake Vanilla
7)That green can of parmesan cheese
8)Most jarred tomato sauces(I will make exceptions in a pinch)
9)Processed bottled salad dressing
10) Cheese food
Thank goodness. I’m glad to know I’m not snobby about something! Love the list…
1) iceberg lettuce
2) lipton tea bags
3) rye anything
4) margarine
5) olives (hey, it’s my kitchen)
6) raisins
7) sugar (i heart xylitol)
8) diet coke
8) splenda, equal or any of that crap
9) spam
10) easy mac (a sacrilege)
thanks, that was fun!
1. tripe
2. spam
3. cocktail wieners
4. soda
4. anything with aspartame
5. artificial flavors/colors
6. coffee
7. T.V. dinners
8. grocery store meat/fish
9. non organic dairy & produce
10. cheese slices (although I am guilty of eating cheez whiz about once every 5 years. And it’s damn good!)
I enjoyed reading everyone’s responses however I was wondering what the deal is with Lipton’s tea bags. I don’t buy them but am I missing something?
Okay, this is fun and interesting….
1. Potted meat (if you don’t know don’t ask!)
2. Canned Gravy
3. vienna sausages (again, don’t ask)
4. fake sugar stuff (substitutes and things, ya know)
5. diet soda…can anyone say ISH?
Well those are the main ones…I’m sure there are more but, some things I put up with cuz I have a lot of children…what can I say???
1. Fresh/frozen fish (deathly allergic)
2. Spam
3. Frozen brownie batter in a tray
4. Frozen family meals
5. Organ meats
6. No-fiber bread
7. Canned pet food
8. Fake crabmeat
9. Crunchy peanut butter
10. Hamburger Helper
I don’t like mayo, but I do have it on-hand for certain recipes and for those poor people who don’t like Miracle Whip! π
1.Anything remotely including dairy products (very allergic)
2.Artificial sweeteners/colours
3.Non-organic eggs
4.Liver
5.Olives
6.Minute Rice
7.Processed meats
8.Relish
9.Anything labelled low-fat
10.Fish farm salmon
no more food snob posts!.. just eat people π
I’d never even heard of Durian before you mentioned it. Thanks for the warning π
I was also surprised by the egg beaters!
This depends on where you live. I once lived in a place where tinned tuna and Heinz baked beans were luxury – so they were served up often. It took me five years to be able to buy either again.
And in New Zealand I could get avocado margarine. Fantastic – it tastes of something. Can’t get that in the UK.
Wouldn’t touch most of the stuff on other people’s lists. I figure with a small supermarket down the road and good deli run by a native of Brooklyn opposite it, why do I want to stockpile food? That’s for places where tinned tuna is a delicacy.
Bare fridge by Friday. Clean it. Pantry 0.25 square metres. If it gets more complicated, trim!
What’s everyone’s issue with Miracle Whip? It’s actually pretty good and for those of us on diets it’s better than the million calories and grams of fat in real mayonnaise
Sonja, are you for real?
I am Louise (“chiff0nade”) a PROFESSIONAL CHEF who graduated from Peter Kump’s Culinary School in my hometown of Brooklyn, NY.
I am also the Senior Adviser for SeriousEats website (probably the MOST widely read food blog on the internet).
With my culinary credentials, I can assure you that “Miracle Whip” will NEVER be found in the pantry of MY house (well, actually my boyfriend “Big Bear’s” trailer house in Clearwater, Florida).
That should put the issue to rest.
For those of you who say they would never put pigs feet in their shopping cart you may want to steer clear of jell-o, marshmallows, and all other gelatin products.
Avocado margarine! Delicious, I would just mash up some avocados and spread it on my sandwich-I would actually prefer that to margarine or mayo.
Anyway, I should probably point out -before this gets too……heated- that everyone is entititled to his/her opinion. Though I do no the feeling when you look in someones fridge and see nothing but crap-how do they live on this stuff!
1. ketchup other than Heinz
2. cool whip
3. miracle whip
4. dark meat poultry
5. canned vegetables except corn
6. margarine/any wannabe butter
7. ham (thankfully we both hate it)
8. air-filled white bread (wonder-like)
9. 4 day old deli meat
10. hard-boiled eggs
since I have at one time or another had most of this list in my kitchen (for whatever reasons)I guess I could say that the only thing I would never have in my kitchen are..
1)foodsnobs
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I am a learned man (several PhD’s, if that excites you)of indisputable pedigree and thus have been accused of snobbery regarding more than just food.
There is not enough room on the internet for me to list that which is forbidden from my household.
1. Anything Asian.
2. California wines, especially Chardonnays
3. Little Debbies
4. Things made in China
5. Any baked good eminating from a supermarket
6. Precut fruit
7. Tater Tots
8. Anything that comes in vacuum packaging
9. Frozen shrimp from Asia
10. Canned chicken
11. Fat Free Half and Half
12. “Butter Flavored” ANYTHING
13. Shelf-stable meat products
14. Anything with “Smart” in its name
15. Non-Angus beef
16. Breakfast cereal
17. “Liv Active” and similar dairy products
18. Ramen noodles
19. Chicken injected with steriods or salt water
20. Rapeseed (canola) oil
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love this!
funny how the first thing I thought of was my husband. I don’t want -him- in my kitchen! π If I had my way (which sadly I don’t living with two very picky eaters) this is what my kitchen would never have:
1. spam
2. velveeta
3. hamburger helper
4. lean cuisine (or any frozen meal)
5. white bread
6. canned pasta
7. jar spaghetti sauce
8. pizza crust in a pouch (or box)
9. cake mixes
10.pre-ground coffee beans.
and here I thought I was going to have a hard time coming up with ten! I think my list could go on and on.
and for the record? I’m a mayo girl.
1. High Fructose Corn Syrup
2. Meat!
3. “Diet” anythings
I read through all the lists and did not pass one person’s list. So no eating at my house HA HA HA.
Nothing is not allowed at my house. if someone else likes it and is gonna cook it, that’s fine. I’m not about to tell someone they can’t bring their a favorite food item into the house simply because it’s my house.
i see why so many people have to host dinner partie…. no one wants to willingly come to most of ya’lls house to eat. They have to be guilt tripped via an invitation!
hear hear coffeepot! said it all!
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